Today it is really proven. Mothers experience more stress, according to a major report from the Social Cultural Planning Office† Men and women are equally burdened with the division of paid and unpaid work. Women work less in paid employment, but do more unpaid work in the family and household. Men and women both have equal free time. Only women do not experience this free time as free time† And that's how it is.
- Mothers quickly feel inadequate at work and in the family
In general, women are perfectionists, they feel enormously responsible and set the bar very high. It's not fast enough. While (this is apparent from the research and I also hear back daily in my practice) their husband much easier to choose for themselves† He can leave things alone if he wants to relax. Because he feels he needs some time to himself. Housekeeping will come later.
And woman ignores her own need faster and can only relax when all the work is done† What this means in practice is that she can hardly ever relaxbecause the work just keeps going. When you're finally sitting on the couch watching a movie, it comes to mind that you might as well fold some laundry in the meantime. That idea.
- Mothers have less free time for themselves
When women have free time, they often fill their free time with their children. And does not feel this free time as free time, but rather as 'being available' for the children. A game of football with your children is great fun, but really something different than a night out with friends, let's say.
- Mothers are always emotionally 'on'
Another point that emerged from the study is that women find it difficult to relax because they emotionally still at work† They often worry about whether their children are doing well in school, what they can do to resolve their child's argument, what to bring to daycare, or how their child will become a better listener.
All in all, enough reasons why it is difficult for mothers to feel relaxed. Which of these three do you recognize yourself in? Do you also want to feel like a relaxed mother? With more time and space for yourself?